Games of Yore #5: F-Zero

First, this is a damned good racing game. I know most of our reviews so far have been blasting games or poking fun at other games. It is kind of a breath of fresh air to review F-Zero. As I said, this is a damned good game.

The only bit of humor I can add to this review is that I am watching two crackheads on G4’s version of Cops.

F-Zero was the very first game I played on my Super Nintendo the Christmas of 90something. It was also the very first game I downloaded on the Virtual Console. I remember staying up until 5 in the morning feeling the joy of electronic sex. F-Zero was the bomb. I spent an entire Christmas break playing it. The funny thing is, the game still rocks.

In case you are not familiar with F-Zero, it was one of the more popular Super Nintendo launch titles. While some sorry saps got Pilotwings and SimCity for Christmas, I was lucky enough to land this gem of a game.

The game features four racers.
1. Captain Falcon who pilots the Blue Falcon is the “poster child” of the F-Zero franchise had loves to wear blue spandex.

2. Dr. Stewart pilots the Golden Fox. The “good doctor” as the manual describes him, was often the glutton of punishment as I often watched his car explode in the races due to its low durability.

3. Yoda pilots the Wild Goose, an atrocity of car that is slow as hell but can take a lot of damage. To be quite honest, this car was the most boring to pilot.

4. Pizza the Hut pilots the Fire Stringray which to me was the best car in the game. It had the slowest acceleration but the best speed and greatest turning ability. Even with a fat guy piloting the vehicle, this car could move.

This game uses “mode 7” graphics which apparently was a breakthrough back in the day. For whatever it was worth, it looked good.

There were three different circuits with five tracks each. Each track was unique and had a bit of charm.

Buy this game if you haven’t. It is nothing short of fun. Sorry I have nothing pithy to say, but I just wanted to post a positive Games of Yore review.

Sorry about the lack of humor, wait till you see the review I have lined up for next week.