Gears of War 2...Thank You God!

When I have a free moment in my life, one of the first things that pops in my head is...I have x amount of time for some Gears.

I loved the original, and when I went through Gears 2, I was blown away by the innovative steps made to make this an awesome, fresh experience.

Where to start....how about new weapons. The flamethrower still makes me think I smell burning flesh when I scorch a grub hole. The lancer seems more raw and powerful then before. The blessed sniper rifle was perfect, and seems just the way I remember it....there's nothing like watching that grub head pop. The new Locust weopons add some new flare to the game as well. If there's any game that really captures the brutal experience of mass destruction, it's this.

New fierce enemies have been introduced into the game. Boomers now have Shredders to help cut you apart. Tickers scurry across the battlefield like little bomb packed roaches...and what a wonderful sound they make. The Reavers are stronger and get right in your face. They, like those damn Blood mounts, work right over your cover and will bust your ass if you don't move.

The addition of all the new enemies adds a great new level of diversity to the game.

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Co-Op in story mode has been a big part of this game, and now it's been upgraded by introducing the Horde Mode.

Five buddies can deal with wave after wave of increasingly difficult enemies. Multi player can take your time once the story mode has been played to it's fullest.

With all the great titles out right now, Gears still stands at the top in my opinion.

It has everything a great title should. Great controls, brutal fighting, smart A.I. and a well developed story.

Gears of war 2 easily deserves the highest scores and praise!

Gears of War 2 Release Party

New Shirts Available Friday - October 17

New shirts available at www.lastactiongamer.com this Friday!

October 11 Release Party Success

Team LXG would like to thank all of you who came out to the release party. It was a huge success! Below are just a few pictures of the event. More to come.




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Soul Caliber IV Review.

One of the big hits of the summer has been keeping us satisfied until the holiday games hit the market. This is defiantly my favorite fighting game on the market now.

The developers have done everything to make sure this game keeps getting play time.

1/2 fighting game, 1/2 rpg, and awesome online matches. This game will take care of all of your needs.

Nothing is better then playing with a couple of friends online, and busting their ass with a lucky last minute blow. Controllers will be thrown, pillows will be kicked. This is how fighting games should be played.

There are many characters to choose from, unlock and buy.

One of the best aspects of this game, is the character creation mode. One can design a character, add gear and weapons that add different stats to the character. This aspect of the game can take up much of your time.

To obtain the items to upgrade your character, you have to play through the game, and achieve certain goals. Playing online, you're certain to see some interesting looking characters that look like something from Tromaville pictures.

This game has everything a fighting game should have and more...so enjoy it! This game deserves perfect scores all around. I'll see you online....and hopefully bust you up.

Returning Next Week

Hey kids. I guess some of you have wondered if we have taken the month of August off. Yessir, yes we have. Vacations, jobs and extra-curricular activities (including the development of our fall lineup) have just sapped away our time. Really.

Ok, so it was the Summer Olympics. We love our synchronized diving! And not to mention we love our Leryn Franco.

When we return after Labor Day, we are going to have a jammed packed fall lineup. Jammed pack full of LXG goodness. Swear.

So, stay tuned.

Your local county library...finally something to offer?

I thought I was getting a good deal when I was paying $20.00 for two games from Gamefly. But what if I could get a game for free? $60.00 dollar games, and I can play them for free? How is this possible you may ask? Simple, check your local library.

Many libraries now carry video games that you can rent for jack (which is nothing for you people who are jive illiterate). My local library gives me a game for 3 weeks, then I can renew it online for an additional amount of time. Selection are usually good, and you can request a game for 1 dollar (at least that's how it works at my library).

The other great thing about visiting the library is there are usually hot girls there doing whatever it is hot girls do at the library....so get a free game, play around with some girls, and enjoy yourself.

With all of these great new titles coming out, even the richest bastards are feeling the burn picking up all these great titles. So, whether you're a french fry boiler, or you snort coke off of super models, free games makes everyone happy.

Under the Radar

So we all know that the big name titles are coming to us all very soon. I figured I'd post about some of the lesser known titles that will have a warm place in our consoles and our hearts.

First up is Beyond Good and Evil 2. Words can't explain how excited I am about this game. The first BG&E was perfect. Let's hope the sequel keeps up.






Next is Marvel Ultimate Alliance 2. Pure Bad-Assery. New heroes, villains, moves, and great co-op button mashing fever. I got next.



Wolfenstein. To quote Dr. Dre, " I started this gangsta s#!t, and this the mf'ing thanks I get?" The original first person shooter is back. What's not to like about this game. Throwback WWII guns, beefy graphics, and most importantly a little Nazi gut stomping.


Little Big Planet. Those cute little bastards. With their great graphics and happy music. Standing over there looking all purdy and stuff. Son of a b!$#h..

Damnation. This game looks awesome. A futuristic Americana type co-op shooter. There's nothing about that phrase that doesn't kick ass.










Left For Dead. Zombies, Zombies, and more Zombies. Why the hell do we love these creatures so much. I mean they have virtually no social skills, they always ruin weddings, and you can't trust them alone with your girlfriend. Seriously, the game looks cool.


Dead Rising 2. Yes, even more zombies. Only this time you can smash their heads in with flat
screens, smack em in the mouth with a skateboard, or play pin the bullet on the zombie from 100 yards away. Sweet!!

Shark Week

This column is not game related, but still quite humorous.

This week is Discovery Channel's famous "Shark Week." We are graced with hours upon hours of footage that display the fearsome predators in all of their might. It has always reminded me that Labor Day is right around the corner and summer is fast coming to a close.

Discovery Channel has recently used "Shark Week" as a mechanism to educate people regarding sharks. Specifically, they are teaching us that sharks aren't that bad and are not out to get us. They teach us that sharks mistake us for seals. Survivorman Les Stroud, an obvious experts on sharks, told me last year that I have nothing to fear when it comes to sharks.

Tonight, I watched three hours of sharks tearing the ever living crap out of people in the must vicious of ways. I watched a dramatization of a woman getting her leg bit off, some poor sap having his arteries severed while protecting a fish he just caught, and an idiot standing in a pool of sharks get bit. Discovery sure does one hell of a sell job on sharks being harmless.

Time to get my harpoon gun.

Serious Fanboys Only

So I was scrolling through the web, bored as all get up. Xbox Live was only doing so much at the time and I was tired of watching cruddy television. Alas, the internet sufficed my boredom when I came across this...http://www.trueswords.com/covenant-energy-sword-video-game-sword-replica-type1-p-4030.html

That's right folks. For only 49.99, one can own a true part of Halo-ness with their very own Covenant Sword. This little beauty actually has the two tone blade that matches the game. At a whopping 27 inches long, don't expect to get past any airport security with this carry on.

Take that Halo Kid.

Who are the winners at this years E3?

Alright, so Nintendo showed us amazing games like......Wii music, er Animal Crossing: city Folk, uh, Wii Sports Resorts...could be fun right? Boo, this is crap.

Sony showed us amazing games like Resistance: Retribution, Little Big Planet, and God of War 3.....Sounds like another tough year for Sony. Thank god they have Metal Gear Solid. Where is awesome Home they've been talking about since launch? Sony ruled the video game world after Nintendo droped the ball in the mid 90's, now it looks like the tourch has been passed again.

Let's see what Microsoft is bringing to the table.

I really tried to give each console a fair chance, but it's so obvious who ruled this event. With games like Gears of War 2, Too Human, Fable 2, and Final Fantasy XIII will be available on the 360 as well.

It looks like this is the age of Microsoft. Long live the king.

The wii may be moving systems by being innovative, and user friendly, but it's only cool if you're 10, drunk, or both.

Playstation should have flooded the market with awesome games at this point, and have all the big games being released on their system, but they don't...so screw them.

Top 5 WTF Moments of 2008 E3

You will have to forgive the lateness of this post. I just came back from sweating my tail off while camping. Never, and I mean NEVER, camp in the middle of the freaking summer. Not the greatest of ideas.

Well, E3 is over and from what I have heard it was rather disappointed. I watched a good deal of E3 on G4 and various gaming sites. I have to agree with some of my journalist friends, this years E3 features a lot of WTF moments. Everybody has their opinions, here are my Top 5 WTF moments (in no particular order).

1. Duffy singing with Lips – Microsoft

Sorry, this was just inexcusable. How is this supposed to appeal to a gamer like myself? Putting a Miley Cyrus clone on stage who can’t even sing her own song right is a loser marketing strategy in my book.



2. At the Movies Demonstration – Microsoft

What do you get when you put four suits together to advertise an extremely dull game? It’s, AT THE MOVIES! I am going to give this an R rating for the pure amount of bullshit I saw on stage.

3. Jack Tretton on stage – Sony

Sony had a mediocre press conference made worse by the fact that Mr. Tretton has the people skills of Oscar the Grouch and excitement of Snuffleupagus regarding the product he is trying to sell.

4. WiiMusic Demonstration – Nintendo

Just watch the video. It is damn funny watching the suits act like they are really playing the instruments. What has come of Nintendo?

Ravi Drums was great.

5. Reggie Files-Aime on stage – Nintendo

“My name is Reggie. I'm about kickin' ass, I'm about takin' names, and we're about makin' games.” Yeah, right.

2006 E3 Sony Press Conference

I found this gem of a video on the internet. The best part was Gengi 2 "an action game based on actual history...famous battles that actually took place in ancient Japan...no here is a giant enemy crab." Classic.

The Dark Knight: Review

Anyone who has watched TV or been on the Internet in the last 6 months has been bombarded with images of the new Batman movie; and for good reason.. this movie is actually good..no GREAT!! It's dark overtone tragically connects the film on a more personal level to one of it's lead stars (Ledger). Who gives THE performance of his short career. Make no mistake about it, this movie may be called The Dark Knight but this was The Joker's show all the way.

I was a bit skeptical at first about how good Ledger would actually be. I mean anyone in their right mind knows that Jack Nicholson was the best Joker right??? Not anymore. Ledger conveys the fiend in a way that makes you almost understand the reason for The Joker's insanity. He conveys the image of a completely detached and deeply psychotic man who for some reason feels completely in control and remarkably sensible, preferring the thrill of the confrontation over the financial benefits that may result. To quote Alfred in reference to the Joker, "Some men just want to see the world burn." Returning for his second appearance, Christian Bale again plays the Batman and gives a solid and functional performance.

This movie is jam packed with action and slick and humorous dialogue. The villains are well thought out and the story leads me to believe that the next film will follow the rise of Two-Face. (see the pic for the only reason a person should need to quit smoking). For the sake of not spoiling the movie let's just say there are a few doors that will close and a few that will open for the next installment.

Movie goers do yourself a favor and SEE THIS MOVIE!!! You won't be disappointed.
The Dark Knight earns 9.0 straight jackets out of 10.

Too Human...too hyped??

With all the hype and games around E3, only one is playable by us at home. This one took ten years to make. Ten years in the making...ten years. As of July 14, we are finally able to play Silicon Knight's(Metal Gear Solid) Too Human on the Xbox 360, at least a few levels. At 1.4MB of space required, the game took a solid 45 minutes to download. The opening scene puts us in a room with many corridors and a giant tree in the center. A woman's voice speaks, greeting you as Baldur. The voice continues describing the 3000 year war that has been going on in an ice age of sorts. In this war, cybernetics have taken way of characters, both good and evil.

Upon beginning your campaign you get to choose your class of warrior. Your choices are Berserker, Defender, Champion, Commando, and Bio Engineer. Each has their own strengths and weaknesses which are described upon highlighting each. Unfortunately being a demo, we omly get to be a Champion, the most rounded of the bunch. The game begins with nice movie of course. The graphics seem a little grainy, but it is just a demo thus far. In a ship, you and your party is drop zoned into an area that is said no humans have returned from. Your character isn't exactly excited about this clarification.

The game is strictly third person. At the bottom left of your screen, you have the level of your character, life, ammo, weapon selection and experience percentage. All the things you need to win a war. Getting used to the controls is tricky. I immediately noticed that there is almost no control of the camera. Your d-pad allows different camera angles, but none are really too different from each other. Your left bumper centers the camera for you, but that's it for being in action. When you are not in combat, you can hold the left bumper and use the right analog stick to look around. Without the left bumper being held, your right analog stick activates your melee weapon. The direction you move the stick, the direction your melee button swings. At first you are armed with dual pistols, each controlled by your right(primary) and left(secondary) triggers. The a button jumps, the b button rolls, the x button is supposed to be a war cry and the y button is your spider skill and the right bumper activates your ruiner.

You run around for a while in these ruins, which don't look too bad. Seems like your enemies like statues. You run around a little more, break a few boxes which contain bounty(dollars) and other such goodies. Alas you'll witness your first enemy. It looks like a cross between a halogen lamp, a sunflower, a puma and Shredder of TMNT. As you fight, you'll use combination of your trigger attacks and your melee attacks depending where your enemies are. Each enemy is also labeled with a number for how much experience that kill is worth. Your first enemies die pretty easily.

As you go on throughout the game, kills award you with experience to level your character up, and skill points. From the pause menu, you can use your skill points to strengthen your character. Whether it be melee, gun, juggle or battle cry, a maximum of 10 points will can be used per class. As you level up each class, your character will be able to perform different moves. Also in the pause menu, you will be able to accessorize your character. Some enemies drop weapons and armor which you can upgrade in mid combat. Other times you can smitherize such items. Sometimes you will pick up weapons that you cannot use immediately because your character's skill level is too low.

So how is the game? It is labeled as an RPG of sorts, I find it more of an upgraded hack and slasher. Sure there are bosses with different weaknesses, but instead of mashing buttons, I'm mashing my analog stick. Some of the bigger enemies use the God of War technique, which requires you to press a button combination to finish them off. The duel pistols allow you to go at it Hard Boiled style, but it's nothing new that we haven't seen already. I actually prefer to use the rifle over the pistols. The graphics and sound are next gen, but nothing blows me away. There are some physics errors here and there. The plot seems to jump back in forth, almost confusing me at first, but leads into why your character can do certain techniques. The controls are probably the hardest thing to get used to, but once that happens, it becomes second nature.

All in all, this isn't the greatest game I have ever played. The action sequences are fun, but repetitive. It did entertain me and I do look forward to more of a story line than what we are provided. I can say this, it is not a game for all. If you are looking for the next best thing, I would keep looking. If you want something less realistic than GTA IV, and more action than a Dynasty Warriors game, this is your best bet. Would I buy it? Probably, would I play it again after I beat it? Probably not.

Look for Too Human to be on shelves August 19, 2008 at the usual Xbox 360 game price of $59.99.

Final Fantasy XCVIIIXXIIIIIIV Trailer

Not-So-Live E3 Microsoft Press Conference

Ok, so we aren’t exactly at E3…or in Los Angeles, but we do have representation at E3. Yes, indeed our apparel is at E3.

So, I had a chance to watch the Microsoft E3 Press Conference…fantastic.

I am going to do a very quick rundown on the presser with specific attention to things I thought were important.

Don Mattrick comes out on stage and says some positive things about the 360. And now, we move onto the games.

1. Fallout 3 from our local boys at Bethesda. For those of you who don’t know, Fallout is a post apocalyptic series. This game is set in D.C. and looks fantastic. I am really looking forward to this game. If you love Oblivion, you will probably want to check this game out. If anything, you are going to want to check the kill scenes. Good lord.

US Release Date: Holiday 2008

2. Resident Evil 5 is up next. Damn, I love the setting. How many games are set in Africa? The graphics look fantatic. What did I like the most? Co-op. This is the first RE title on XBOX and I am sure it will not disappoint.

US Release Date: March 13, 2009…that’s Friday the 13th.

3. Fable 2 is done and is an RPG. After watching RE 5 and Fallout 3, I am a little underwhelmed by the graphics. What I thought was really cool about this game was the VERY extensive co-op. If one of your friends is playing, you can find him or her in real time in the location they are currently at in the game. Very nice.

US Release Date: October

4. Gears of War 2: Intense, intense, intense. Very nice options and new weapons. The demo they showed was phenomenal. The graphics look ridiculously good.

US Release Date: November 7

Ok, those were the big four games. Don comes back out and talks about how fantastic the 360 is and how it dominates all other consoles. John Schappert comes out and starts talking about 360 innovation. Some highlights of this part.

1. NBC and Universal are both partnering with XBOX.

2. New Dashboard – please see Stealhcon’s post.

3. Gameshows for XBOX Live – 1 vs. 100.

….Good lord, is the XBOX really becoming an interactive console experience? I dunno, I just dunno…

4. Microsoft is partnering with Netflix…interesting.

Shane Kim comes on stage.

Ok, what the hell is up with all of these “suits?” The people that are coming on stage have to be the most socially awkward people. Gaming is a hobby. The last person I want talking to me about games is an Amway salesman.

Banjo Kazooie, Viva Pinata 2, Scene It! Box Office Smash..

The next thing that they announced is “You’re in the Movies.” This is where I started to laugh my ass off.

Shane Kim, Don Mattrick, John Schappert are all on stage for this doozy. Talk about suits looking ridiculous, it reminded me of the Lambda Lambda Lambda parties on Revenge of the Nerds.

In “You’re Making an Ass of Yourself,” you use the xbox live cam to…make an ass of yourself. Stupid stuff. Sorry, not for me.

Now we get to the music part.

Another suit, Kai Huang comes out and is even more socially awkward than the others. At least Peter Moore had some social skills.

Guitar Hero World Tour allows you to make your own songs. Metallica is partnering! This one looks very good.

Keeitchi Yanno comes out on stage to debut LIPS!

Yanno was obviously under the influence of some very good alcohol when he decided to name a game “lips.” There is just too many bad jokes hidden there.

Lips is a karaoke game. Wow, a motion sensitive microphone! You can rip music off of your Zune and iPod and sing along with it. And…Duffy comes out to turn this press conference to..

LUDICROUS SPEED!

Ok, enough of that garbage.

Rock Band 2 is up next. Looks good with a huge song list. I am looking forward to this. What song am I look forward to the most?

“Eye of the Tiger” by Survivor. God Bless you Harmonix.

Wada from Square Enix comes out next and talks about the games Square Enix is producing.

Infinite Undiscovery, The Last Remnant and Star Ocean are all coming out in the next year.

Ok, we are done…

Wait a minute, Wada is back on stage.

Holy Shit.

FINAL FANTASY XVVIIIIXXII for XBOX 360!

WTF?

E3...Xbox 360 Updated Dashboard

So I've decided that this post won't be about the games rather the system. The game reviews will be updated at the close of E3 2008.

As I watch what the folks at Microfsoft have in store for their staple system I have to admit that I am rather impressed. Mainly at the upgrade to their existing Xbox Dashboard. They say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery and after seeing what Microsoft has done the saying couldn't be more true. It is obvious that the folks at Apple have been getting under Microsoft's skin. The new Xbox Dashboard will look extremely familiar to anyone who has ever experienced the Leopard OS for Apple computers. The interactive panel system used in programs like Front Row for Apple have their influences conveyed in the new Xbox floating panel menu system.

Another blatant rip-off is the inclusion of the new Xbox version of Nintendo's Mii community. Gamers can now create their own unique avatars and interact with others from around the world, with distinct Mii looking characters. The uniqueness comes in when Xbox does what it does best. Allow gamers to connect. Cool innovations like group gaming, chatting, and even movie and television watching make this a truly unique experience. From what I took from the demo, if one person purchases a movie he or she can invite up to 7 friends to watch the video with them online. Cool Sh&%!!

I have never been into downloading TV shows on my XBL however I do occassionaly download movies. Microsoft has announced partnerships with NetFlix, NBC, and Universal. These high end partnerships can only mean one thing...extensive media options.

This fall update appears to be a doozy. It completely re-does everything about the XBox dashboard. Let's hope they didn't break something that didn't need fixing.

Overall, I am impressed with though still curious about Microsoft's new changes. My updated review on the changes will come along with the XBL update this fall.

SId Meiers's Civilization Revolution Xbox 360 review.

During the summer drought, It's always nice to have a good game to hold you over. Not only will this game hold you over, but it may stay in your disk tray for a long time. This is exactly what the Xbox needed, a well put together strategy game. The buttons and actions are simple and well organized.

The concept of the game is fantastic. You start out with an ancient civilization, and through research, development, and cultural enlightenment, you grow....until you either smash your enemies, control a vast majority of wealth, or have the majority of super fancy people (cultural victory). You get to choose from some of the greatest leaders the world has ever known (Caesar, Alexander, Ghengis Khan, Napoleon, etc).

Military:

I was very pleased with how military units are developed and controled. Build a town, order a unit, and that's it. Build different structures to improve the units that are created, easy stuff. Once you have a unit, it can move a certain amount of spaces depending on its capabilities. Get three of the same unit, hit the Y button...you've got an army.

I was amazed at the massive volume I was able to churn out unit after an hour or so. The A.I. is very clever and doesn't waste time getting Sh&% done. Negotiating is a great concept in the game. You can buy yourself valuable time, by making a temporary truce, or paying the enemy off to leave you alone.

One of the best parts of this game is invading a town with tanks and plains only to find it is defended by losers with swords and arrows. If you have some old units that stick around, they can quickly become
outdated.

Culture:

Build magnificent structures, and spread your civilization far and wide. Great people throughout history will show up in your towns. Get enough of them, build the united nations....and you rule the world. Having great people join you adds massive bonuses to your stats....and lets everyone else know that your better then them.

Finances:

Hoard the worlds wealth, and control the world. Realistic enough right? Build the world bank, and you can sit back and know that the world is yours.

It's nice that you don't have to smash the enemy to pieces to win this game. You can play it however you like. Choose your government...democracy holding you back from slaughtering other nations? give Communism a try!

Invention is another key to success in this game. Develop religion, writing, or nuclear weapons. Developing these will greatly improve the culture and military in your cities.

Yes, you can play this online. Set up a random match on xbox live, and see who the better man is. Get a game going with your friends.....endless fun is to be had with this game.

This game came out at a great time. It would have been a shame to this come out in September-December and be overshadowed by the big hitters.

Let's see 4 out of 5, 8 .5 out of 10. 1,5 thumbs up, two snaps and twirl.

MGS 4: Guns of the Patriots

Well, well, well, good ole' Snake is up to his old tricks again..sneaky bastard. The forth and final installment in the Metal Gear franchise pits Snake, now Old Snake, against an impressive cast of characters. From the moment the opening credits began rolling, I knew I was in for something special. After hearing rumors of a 90 min. intro I was very curious to see what was in store. Turns out that the intro wasn't 90 minutes but it was very entertaining. I was extremely impressed.

The transition between cut-scenes and live action was seamless and there was virtually no change in the graphics. And speaking of graphics, the game is a beauty to look at. Though I was initially apprehensive about the sandy brown and stone setting of the Middle East my perspective quickly changed mostly due to the use of my stealth suit's ability to blend in with the textured environments.

The action is intense and the strategy encompasses elements of both stealth and all out action. Fans of the MG series will be delighted at the new control scheme.

The sound is amazing. You will be delivered into surround sound bliss as you listen to enemies' conversations and wonderful sound effects scattered about.

The story is what you would expect from MG..complex and full of conspiracies. I understand that all of the questions left unanswered from previous MG games will be answered. I hope so. I'm dying to know what the hell the La-Li-Lu-Le-Lo is...???

Overall, this game ROCKS!!! A must buy for any PS3 owner. Full of action, stealth, awe-inspiring moments, and plenty of secrets you'd be crazy to miss this.

Metal Gear Solid 4: Guns of the Patriots earns 9.5 conspiracy theories out of 10

Diablo III Announced

Hey kids, just a quick FYI. Blizzard, the drug pushers who brought us World of Warcraft, announced Diablo III. Although I consider myself a console gamer, I do like to play a few PC games. Diablo has always been one of my favorite PC franchises.

Call of Duty: World at War Preview

(what all the Germans are dead, well let's move on the the Japanese)

Looks like WWII isn't over yet. After being spoiled by high powered modern weapons, it's back to Thompson machine guns and the MI Garand (Ping).

This time the focus is on the Pacific theater. It looks like there will be a lot of wild close combat (probably involving katana's and determined Japanese people). I'm picturing a lot of Japanese jumping out of bushes.

From what we've seen so far, this game looks like it's going to be pretty brutal...a lot of screen shots of bayonet/katana impalings. This game could have a real thriller aspect to it.

It's always hard to accept another WWII shooter into a market that is very tired of seeing it, but if anyone can make on that's worth my time...it's these guys.

On another note, it doesn't look like Activision's main team is making this game, so I'm not expecting another Modern Warfare.

One thing we can expect is a good single player and endless multiplayer action. I'm just worried that after playing Modern Warefare, there is no going back to WWII....maybe the melee aspect will add a much needed aspect to a tired genre.

Dark Sector: Xbox 360 Demo Review

Let me start off by saying....what a waste of potential. After reading dozens of articles on how this was the first next-gen game created and how it was being crowned as the next-gen king, I was extremely stoked about playing this game. Too bad.

As Hayden Tenno, a cliched blade wielding hero with a bad haircut and in uber physical shape, you will use various tools of destruction to dismember and disembowel your enemies. His right arm is some sort of bionic slingshot that hurls his glaive (i.e. super bad-ass ninja star) while his left hand holds his pistol. You will occasionally be able to pick up slaughtered enemies' weapons for added firepower however for some stupid reason you can only carry them for a short period of time.... LAME!!

The demo places you in some sort of semi-evacuated USSR type military encampment. You will quickly learn to use either your pistol or your glaive as the first set of hellions attack you almost instantly. You will eradicate them without any trouble. As you progress you realize just how much potential this game had. The character graphics are nice to look at for the most part with sharp edges and defined textures. That much cannot be said about the maps however. The maps appear to be dark, dull, and lifeless. I am not a big fan of games that use mostly dark greens and muted greys to emphasize darkness.

The controls are not very user-friendly either. After playing games like Gears of War you would expect game developers to realize just how important controls are to any action game. Hayden feels very stiff when he moves, there is no sprint button, and the cover system has a been there done that better somewhere else feel.

I couldn't tell you much about the story as the demo doesn't take you that deep. Only that you are an experiment and you must defeat somebody to keep something from happening. Nice.

Anyway, overall this was a let down. I really couldn't offer you much reason to buy this game at full price other than I read something about Hayden being able to upgrade his glaive with powers such as flames and lightening; invisibility, and maybe a decent story-line.

Overall, Dark Sector the Demo earns: 6 rusty glaives out of 10.

Spike's Game Trailers

Greetings! This is the Full Effect's first blog and I'll be reviewing/highlighting Spike TV's June 21 show of Spike's GameTrailers. In total, four games were exclusives for the show. The Lord of the Rings Conquest, Call of Duty: World at War(trailer only), Star Wars: The Clone Wars(trailer only), and UFC 2009 were all segments of the show.

First off, for all you fanboys, get ready to crap yourself. The Lord of the Rings Conquest looks amazing. The game developers at Pandemic really out did themselves. If you are unsure of Pandemic's history, check out Star Wars Battlefront I and II. That being said, the LOTRC does to LOTR what Battlefront did for Star Wars. In the game, players will play battle sequences from the beginning of Tolkien's master trilogy to the end. Even more exciting, if you haven't read or seen the trilogy Frodo and the defenders of Middle Earth destroy the ring, is an alternate ending. Instead of victory for the forces of good, Sauron, aka ultimate badass, gets the ring and the forces of evil work backwards all the way back to the Shire. Finally, for those of you who wished you were able to kick Elijah wood in the teeth, now's your chance. Hugo Weaving, Smith in the Matrix and Elron in the LOTR series, provides narration for both the good and evil campaigns. Just as exciting will be the multiplayer. Just as you could pit the likes of Chewbacca vs. Darth Vader in Battlefront, you can set up the matches not seen in the story or the movie. The only time we got to see Sauron in the movie was in highlights. Now he can become a playable character and players can test his abilities against the all loving Greybush...I mean Gandalf. What really impressed me the most was the multiplayer game where one character is Frodo and the rest are Ring Wraiths. Instead of vehicles you'll be able to control trolls and ents and oliphants, yes I read the stories go ahead and wedgie me, and you will plow through hordes of enemies.

The other highlight of the show was UFC 2009. Yes, it is a little ballsy for potty mouthed Dana to come out with yet another mixed martial art video game. The original UFC came out for the Playstation, the Dreamcast and for the GameBoy color...nuff said. Also owned by UFC owners Zuffa, Pride's mediocre PrideFC came out for the Playstation 2. Dana though assured viewers that those games came out before Zuffa took over UFC and Pride so they take no responsibility for the flops. Zuffa went with THQ, famous for Saints Row and WWE games, to provide the full onslaught of ground and pound. As a fan and a practicer of mma, I am pleased with the way this game looks. Full body scans were used to detail the fighters and the physics of the ring useage look realistic. Gameplay looks a little choppy, but then again, so is ground fighting. Zuffa was smart to use the highlight of their upcoming light heavyweight championship bout of Forest Griffen and Quinten 'Rampage' Jackson as the demo fight for the game. Also making an apperance in the trailer was mma referee Mario Yamaguchi. The game features all your favorite guard passes, sweeps, takedowns and ko's with a fully functinal 360 degree camera view. The realism of the styles of each fighters will also keep fans/gamers entertained. The biggest problem is that it is not expected until sometime next Spring. Are we not entertained? Not for a while.

All in all, the future of gaming looks positive. Look for more reviews soon. To view this episode of GT check out http://www.spike.com/full-episode/lord-of-rings-conquest/27798. Until then...keep gaming!

Top Ten Most Anticipated of E3

The annual E3 Media & Business is right around the corner kiddies. This is the event that all men in their late teens to late forties look forward to every year. With such stars as Jenna Jameson, Cindy Haze, and Brianna Banks in attendance, you know this will resemble chubby kids gone wild in a candy store.

Unfortunately, the powers that be won’t let us in!

Don’t you worry, we have our “agents” that will give us the inside scope on this cornucopia of sex, drugs, and violence. Ok, maybe not the sex…or the drugs...and the violence will probably be limited to the video games.

Now, I have cruised around the internet and found several top 5 to top 20 anticipated games of E3. Well, here is our top picks for the most anticipated games of E3.

10. Spore – The much heralded and anticipated game for the PC and eventually Wii. This has all the potential of being a completely fascinating game or a complete boring bust. The new Spore Creature Creator has produced some very interesting designs which people have been showing off. Whoopee!

9. Soulcaliber IV – Yeah, this game deserves to be on this list because Yoda is going to be in a fighting game. Righteous. Did you see him in Star Wars?

8. Spooge - This game is Spore’s sequel, already in development. I think the title says it all.

7. Lego Aquaman

6. Mortal Kombat vs. DC Universe - I really want to put a foot up Aquaman’s ass. What’s your super power? I can swim real fast and talk to fish!

5. Fable 2 – That dude from Lionhead studios talked the talk about the original Fable, which many believe didn’t live up to its potential. Now, Peter Molyneux is talking the same talk about Fable 2. Some of the proposed features include gardening, simulated crapping, and raising your own children…in different towns with different wives perhaps?

4. Resident Evil 5

3. Fallout 3 – From our local boys in Bethesda and from the creators of Oblivion, this will be the dark horse of the holiday releases.

2. Gears of War 2 – I really don’t need to say anything here. Gears of War rocked, I expect nothing less.

1. The Oregon Trail II: Salvation – This time you play the role of Jack Bauer, key secret agent of the United States. You have to guide your party of experts through the Oregon Trail to find the hidden Al-Qaeda base somewhere in Northern California. With state of the art graphics and Keifer Sutherland providing fantastic voice acting, Oregon Trail II will take E3 by storm.

Games of Yore - Tag Team Wrestling (NES)

As a young dork, I loved the WWF. I have to admit I was a Hulkamaniac. I had all of the oversized non-movable wrestling figures that really didn’t serve a purpose with the exception of harassing my pet dog. However, my dog’s paw of fury would inevitably take down Hillbilly Jim and end the fight with the jaws of doom.

Well, my father sure as hell knew I was a wrestling fan. He took me and my kid sister to the (then) Baltimore Arena to watch Hulk Hogan live! My father almost pissed himself because he didn’t want to leave me and my kid sister alone. It was kind of funny because some of the wrestlers wouldn’t show up because they got piss drunk the night before.

One Christmas I received two wrestling games from my NES, Pro Wrestling and this steaming pile of turd, Tag Team Wrestling. Seriously, this game deserves its personal spot in video game hell.

There isn’t a single redeeming quality about Tag Team Wrestling. You start off as The Ricky Fighters, a team of brothers played by 80’s icon Ralph Macchio and his disfigured kid brother (who wears a mask in this game) Matt Damon.

Your first opponents are the Strong Bads, two guys who work at McDonald’s during the day and dress up in fetish costumes and wrestle at night. After you demolish the Strong Bads, your next challengers are…the Strong Bads. No, I am not kidding, you had to wrestle the Strong Bads over…and over…and over….and over. The programmers gave kids like myself a huge middle finger by putting four generic, crappy wrestlers into this steaming pile of turd.

Ok, so there are only two teams in the game…they must have put all of their effort into the graphics.

The graphics were downright horrible, even for the NES. I believe the programmers must have been 8 years old and 7 years old respectively. There were so many “WTF” moments when it came to graphics.
(1)When you whip your opponent into the ropes, you run to opposite ropes, both with your hands up in the air and your oversized stomachs exposed only to come together with one big bologna belly slap.
(2)When you get thrown to the outside you literally float to the floor
(3)The bodyslam looked like some weird kama sutra position
(4) So did the chokehold

Ok, so bad graphics and two teams, the gameplay must be the saving grace!

The gameplay was even more pathetic. When you hit your opponent to perform a move, you had to move your gamepad left or right to select the move you wanted to do from a list. Talk about game slowdown. It eventually was bodyslam, bodyslam, and of course, bodyslam.

The worst part of this game? The Ricky Fighters doing the “I hope I don’t piss myself” dance on the ring apron.

Don’t play this game…ever.

The joys of moving....and finding old NES cartridges.

One of the big factors I've had to deal with this week is moving to a new location. This meant a week of no Internet, no video games, and no TV. Oh how nice it is to be back in the world of technology again.

After a very tiring week, I have all of my fantastic gadgets functioning properly again....so let's review something. While moving I had time to go through my closet and see all of my wonderful NES games. In my opinion, most of these games are better off as fond memories.

(What have you been up to?)

Once in a while I get an urge to pick up the old controller and relive all the fun times I had as a kid, but when I do....it's not quite the same as I remember. I believe once one gets used to the perfection that game developers have created these days there's no going back for me.

I tried going through the original Final Fantasy. It was great to see the original charters and hear the music that I remember so well, but then I realized just how long it took to fight a battle, get around the map, etc, and I understand now that I tolerated these things because that's all we had back then, and it was great at the time....it just doesn't work now. I guess it's kind of like swiping your v-card. It's great then because you don't know how much better it can get.

All in all, a trip down memory lane can be fun.....in short bursts. Then again some gamers pay to download these games and are very happy, for like two minutes.

Apologies...

Hey kids, my apologies for the lack of posting in the past couple o' days. Games of Yore will be out manana.

Also, to add to the mix, yours truly has picked up a copy of Metal Gear Solid 4. So far it is a solid game. I will give my impressions tomorrow.

Again, sorry about the lack of posting. The past couple of days have been focuses on product and less on this blog.

New Retailer: Games and Stuff

Lest us not forget that the main purpose of this blog is to blatantly promote our niche apparel company, Last Action Gamer. Well, the kids of LXG are happy to announce that we have a third retailer selling our fine apparel, Games & Stuff of Glen Burnie, Maryland. Hooray for us!

Shortly after the meeting, Director of Operations, Jamar Williams had this to say, "I think my car was towed."

President of LXG, James Braswell followed by stating, "This is an exciting day for LXG. Every new retailer is a small victory for the gaming community. Games and Stuff runs a first class operation and we are more than happy that they decided to carry our gear. We look forward to plenty of cross-promotion opportunities. In addition, I think it proves that our product is something the gaming community wants."

For more information on Games & Stuff, please check out their website at www.gamesandstuffonline.com.

Metal Gear Solid Review!!!

If you thought the mother of all video games was released in late April, guess again. Metal Gear Solid 4: The Depends Years was released this week to much acclamation, hoopla, and scores of 10. Yes, it is the GTAIV release all over again.

If you listened closely, you could hear the sounds of PS3 owners throwing their copies of GTA IV across the room like a Frisbee to experience the sheer joy of an 8 minute install screen.

I hate to break it to you kids but I have not picked up a copy of the game yet. Last night, I had the choice between leaving in the middle of Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom to pick up the game, or staying until the end of the movie then playing The Oregon Trail. Needless to say, I chose the latter.

On a serious note, I have cruised around to various websites where gamers can post their reviews of the game. It has been 10 after 10 after 10. Instant Classic, Masterpiece, and I Left my Boyfriend for Solid Snake were all titles of the reviews I read. You can also click on a gamer’s profile to read other reviews he or she has posted. I will be damned if the same gamers who stated that MGSIV was the greatest game ever said the same exact thing about GTAIV. A 10 for a game should not be easily thrown around.

Unlike GTA (with the exception of Vice City), I have been a big fan of Metal Gear since the NES. And yes, I am still wondering what to do with those damn cigarettes. I intend to pick up this game next week and post a review as soon as I have time. The Oregon Trail has been calling my name.

Civilization Revolutions Demo Review

Another JC Braz Disclaimer: I am writing this review with two orange juice and vodkas in me.

Your’s truly is a real time strategy fan. Warcraft, Rise of Nations, Age of Empires, Starcraft, you name it. There has always been one franchise that has brought me to the brink of throwing my overpriced computer across the room; that game is Civilization. Much like Franciscan Nun’s take a vow of celibacy, I took a vow of celibacy from the Civilization series.

When I turned on my computer the other day, I saw a little cheeky fellow that looked like Napoleon that was urging me to download of a demo for Civilization Revolution. It was either GTAIV or the demo, I choose the demo.

I have to admit, this game is actually fun. JC Braz is a big history buff and enjoys nuances in games that have a historical significance. Revolutions fits that bill with the Civilopedia.

The one thing I hated, I absolutely detested about prior Civilization games, was what seemed like an overcomplicated and convoluted interface. Revolutions finally gets it right. Much like a bartender who takes four or five tries to get that perfect mixture, Sid Meier finally got it right.

Graphically, Revolutions is very colorful which is a nice change from the humdrum graphics of previous Civilization games. Your advisors pop up on the screen when you accomplish tasks like building cities, science, and deal with armies. It is kind of funny to see them push each out of the way when you change from task to task.

The game is essentially about building an empire. Unlike other RTS where you amass a fortune, build a ludicrous speed army, and annihilate the other player, this game can be won in several different ways. You can win with “culture” which for those pacifists out there, would be the preferable way of winning the game. This game does what other RTS games does not, it takes into consideration different playing styles.

The 360 versions is fantastically streamlined and perfectly mapped to the 360 controller. I wasn’t sure about the transition here, but it really works well.

I love the blatant stereotypes of the different leaders. If you don’t know what I mean, just check out the feminine Greeks. I actually visited some forums who were upset about the stereotypes. Seriously people, it’s a freaking game.

I am really looking forward to this game when it is released. I suggest the readers download the demo and give it a try for themselves.

Wow, a serious post by me.

What a joke

Seriously, I don't know who I can't stand MORE, Jared from Subway or Billy Mitchell.

Games of Yore #6: The Oregon Trail

Nothing brings up controversy like an argument revolving around the greatest game of all time. Some claim that Super Mario 3 is the greatest game of all time. Those same people eat rocks and enjoy the smell of their own farts. I say this, The Oregon Trail IS the greatest game of all time.

I am sure you all remember going to the computer lab in school to experience the pure ecstasy of playing this “educational” game. As your teacher walked around the lab acting like he/she gave a rat’s ass about your game progress, you experienced the game of games.

This game is produced by MECC, some computer education company that produced such other gaming masterpieces like Odell Lake and The Yukon Trail.

You start off the game by selecting among three characters, Duane “The Rock” Johnson, Arnold Schwarzenegger, and of course, Chuck Norris. Each character has his own “bonus” Schwarzenegger has the power of politician, which means he can bullcrap his way out of any obstacle, but he also is able to rip up trees from their roots. This is good for camping.

Johnson is not as strong as Schwarzenegger, but is more agile which allows him to jump from cliff to cliff easier than the older Schwarzenegger.

Chuck Norris is Chuck Norris. He has the power of invincibility and roundhouse kick. He has an extra bonus the “power of laughter.” When enemy characters see Norris, they fall to their knees in laughter.

There is actually a hidden character in the game, Chris Farley. However, Farley is fat and slow and eventually dies in the middle of the game from massive diarrhea. This is automatic and I have not been able to find out how to counteract the effects of Farley eating raw meat. Farley does come with the most money.

Once you select your main character, you have to name the other members of the party. Most of us gave profane names to our party members hoping that our school teacher wouldn’t see our screen.

Before you head off, you have to purchase supplies for your mission to Oregon. You have to purchase food, designer clothing, spare parts (i.e. Oak wheel parts, toilet paper, and Pepto), weapons (i.e. machine guns and ninja stars), and oxen.

I figured out a code where you can add a horse instead of oxen. The code will unlock Sarah “Horseface” Jessica Parker as your trusty steed. You can use Parker as a way to track down deer and buffalo more efficiently during your journey.

Once you buy you supplies, you make your way through The Oregon Trail.
This is where the game shows its true colors. The graphics are phenomenal, if not the best. The water effects are some of the best to date! As you travel on your journey, your main character will have to make key decisions.

Hunting is the greatest part of the game. The hand to hoof combat in the game is perfect. I never had as much joy in a game like I did when Norris roundhouse kicked a buffalo in the face. This game is so intense that you can actually kick a buffalo horn off the buffalo and use it as a weapon to stab the very buffalo it belonged to.

Unfortunately, you will come across Indians in the game. Indians employ explosive tipped arrows to thwart your band of merry men. If you were smart enough, you purchased bullet/explosive proof cloth for your Conestoga wagon. This will alleviate some of the harsher effects from Indian raiding parties.

Your main character will have a variety of weapons at his disposal. Although you start off the game with a wad of paper and a straw, as your character levels up and visits forts in the game, you will be able to purchase weapons like an AK-47.

The Oregon Trail is not without its obstacles. You will have to make key decisions in game. Should you ford across the river in your wagon or should you use a rocket propelled grenade launcher to take down some trees to make a bridge to cross the river?

Disease runs rampant in this game. As your main character, you will have to avoid the effects of small pox, malaria, and dysentery (the craps!).

The platforming elements of the game can be tedious, but really exploit the power and range of the game. It puts Mario to shame.

The subquests in the game are some of the most awe inspiring since Oblivion. You will have the option to go on the quest for the Holy Grail or track down the Fountain of Youth. As you explore dungeons, you will find different clues that will eventually lead you to these relics which will add up to extra points at the end of the game!

Eventually, after traveling down the trail for a long time, you will have to whitewater raft down the Nile River. This part of the game presents its own set of problems. You will have to deal with crocodiles, terrorists, and man-sized scorpions. Again, depending on how far you were able to level up your main character, this can be an easy task or a daunting task.

I cannot downplay the role the graphics play in this part of the game. The Nile River comes alive as never before. It actually looked like a Discovery HD presentation.

At the end of the game, you will have to battle Godzilla to save all humanity. Rosie O’Donnell does a fantastic job of portraying Godzilla in the game. I was actually surprised to see that MECC was able to get Rosie to participate in the game.

The music in the game is phenomenal. This music is provided by award winning video game music composer Yayuseme Suckamebalzto, whom produced such hits as Bubble Bobble and Operation Wolf.

All in all, this game is a 10 out of 10.

First Images of Street FIghter IV

Uncharted: Drake's Fortune Review

As I sorted through JC Baz's game collection over the weekend I noticed a game that still had the plastic on it. Very rare in any household where gamers reside. I picked it up and noticed that it was Uncharted: Drake's Fortune (UDF). When he saw that I had the game in hand he mention that he had it for 6 moths and hadn't played it once. So, I decided to give it a try. They say that sometimes great efforts go overlooked and a gem may be right under your nose and you never notice it. Such is the case for UDF.
From the moment I popped in the disc I was immediately impressed by the high level of detail, amazing sound quality, beautiful visuals, and fantastic atmosphere. The game is very vivid and the color palette very robust. If you are a fan of Tomb Raider and Indiana Jones you'll love this game.
The character movements are very fluid and the cut scenes and live action transition perfectly. It's the little things in this game that make it memorable. For example, there is a part in the game where your control Drake through a partially submerged vessel. As he navigates through the doors in the hull he actually ducks to avoid hitting his head. Jump into a river and the character emerges completely soaked, with darker shades of clothing to emphasize the wetness. The levels are vast and cavernous and really make you feel like an explorer.
There are plenty of hidden items to obtain which will add to the replay value and the story is actually decent enough to pay attention to. The A.I. is very intelligent and will try to ambush you, flank you, and force you into the open with grenades.
The character models of the lead cast are phenomenal. They boast realistic facial expressions and realistic movement.
My biggest beef with this game is the off and on shooting style and the camera angles at times. When you are in the midst of a heated gun-fight it can be very taxing to lock on to your target. There is no indicator to let you know when you are aiming at an enemy so shooting from a distance can be a chore. Also, enemies have the grace of a ballerina, ducking shots like Neo in the matrix. The enemy design is nice however you will be fighting the same 5-6 enemies over and over again. The camera makes things frustrating when you simply want to jump to ledge and it zooms in so close to your character that you can't see the ledge that you are standing on and fall over and over again to your death. The camera does make things feel cinematic but doesn't always provide the best view for game-play.
At the end of the day UDF rocks! This is a must have for any PS3 owner. Get it now, I'm sure it's probably in the bargain bin by now. Enjoy. Uncharted: Drake's Fortune earns 9 sunken treasures out of 10.

Good games coming soon.

Yes, it's that time of year...the video game draught season.

We are left to survive on the great games that came to us in the prior months, looking forward to the next round of great games. Here is a brief look at some of the big games coming to us soon (and some that are just a little surprising to see).


Metal Gear Solid 4 Guns of the Patriots.

A lot of fans have been waiting for this for a long time. This will be available on 6/12/08. Play as old man snake, and prove that your Viagra is doing its job.





Fallout 3-10/7/08

The boys at Bethesda are at it again with this massive post apocalyptic survival adventure. Do condoms prevent the spread of radiation?





Gears of War- 2 11/3/08

I miss my saw.....I can't wait to get blood splattered on my television screen again.






Street Fighter IV- 2/3/09

This series got many of us through the arcade years. I can still remember the quarters lined up on the machine. How will SF be received in the 21st century? Hopefully better then the mullet.


Deadliest Catch Alaskan Storm -6/17/08.


Really? Please stop making games based on movies and television shows. What's next, Ghost Hunters?

JC Braz Edit: Justin (JTrip) has this on preorder.






Fable 2- 10/1/08

What happens in Fable, stays in Fable. If you screwed a guy in the first game, I don't want to know about it.






This has been a overview of games that are on their way, with brief A-hole commentary. Thank you.